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Holy Matrimony
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“Love that leads to marriage is a gift from God and a great act of faith toward other human beings.”
+ St. Pope John Paul II
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The Sacrament of MatrimonyThe celebration of marriage between two Catholic faithful normally takes place during Holy Mass because of the connection of all the sacraments with the Pascal mystery of Christ.
It is therefore fitting that the spouses should seal their consent to give themselves to each other through the offering of their own lives by uniting it to the offering of Christ for his Church made present in the Eucharistic sacrifice, and by receiving the Eucharist so that , communicating in the same Body and the same Blood of Christ, they may form but “one body” in Christ.[1621, Catechism of the Catholic Church]
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Couples who wish to be married at St. Stephen the First Martyr are asked to begin by reviewing our Parish Wedding Guidelines.
Because marriage preparation takes time, couples should become familiar with the parish guidelines well in advance of the desired wedding date. This helps them understand the process, required documents, and important details for planning the wedding liturgy.
After reviewing the guidelines, please contact the parish office to begin the preparation process and discuss the next steps. We also ask that you bring or submit your completed Wedding Intake Form to the parish office at that time.
If a visiting priest or deacon will celebrate or assist at your wedding, he must also provide the parish with the required documentation from his diocese or religious community. The necessary form is attached below.
You will then be guided through the next steps of preparation.
MARRIAGE PREPARATION
Marriage preparation is meant to help you enter married life with a strong spiritual, emotional, and practical foundation.
As part of your preparation, couples may be asked to:- meet with the priest or deacon
- complete the necessary marriage paperwork
- provide recent sacramental certificates, if needed
- participate in a marriage preparation program or retreat
- complete any required marriage preparation inventory
- receive guidance for planning the wedding liturgy
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Your wedding is a joyful day for you and for your families, but it is also something more. In the Church, marriage is a sacred celebration. It is a moment of grace, prayer, and worship. Because of that, your wedding liturgy should be prepared with care and should reflect the beauty of the Sacrament of Marriage.
Preparing the liturgy is an important part of your wedding preparation. It helps you look at the day not only as an event to organize, but as a holy moment in which you give yourselves to one another before God and the Church. The parish is here to help you through that process. We want to make it clear, peaceful, and helpful for you.
For that reason, we are providing helpful documents to guide you as you prepare for your wedding celebration.
One of the first things to understand is that the Church has three forms for the celebration of marriage.- When two Catholics are married, the Rite of Marriage is normally celebrated within Mass.
- When a Catholic marries another baptized Christian, the Rite of Marriage is usually celebrated outside Mass, within a celebration of the Liturgy of the Word.
- When a Catholic marries someone who is not baptized, the Rite of Marriage is also usually celebrated outside Mass, again within a celebration of the Liturgy of the Word.
So the first important step is to understand which form applies to your marriage. This will shape the structure of the liturgy and help you prepare the rest of the celebration in the right way. To make this easier, we have included PDFs of the different forms of the Rite of Marriage so that you can become familiar with them and better understand your options.
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As you prepare for your wedding, we ask you to take time to review the parish guidelines and the attached planning documents. These materials are meant to help you understand how a Catholic wedding is celebrated in the Church and how to prepare for it with peace and clarity.
A wedding in the Church is not only a beautiful ceremony. It is a holy sacrament. For this reason, the music, photography, videography, and all other parts of the celebration should respect the sacred character of the liturgy.
Please review the following documents carefully:
Wedding Music Guidelines and Forms
This form helps you prepare the music for your wedding Mass or ceremony. Music should be sacred, prayerful, and appropriate for the celebration of the Sacrament of Matrimony.
Photography and Videography Guidelines
These guidelineshelp photographers and videographers understand how to work respectfully during the wedding liturgy, without distracting from prayer or the sacredness of the moment.
If you have questions as you review these materials, please contact the parish office. We will be happy to help you take the next step in preparing for your wedding day.
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Some couples may have circumstances that require additional conversation before setting a wedding date.
For example:- one or both persons were previously married
- a Catholic is marrying a non-Catholic
- marriage took place civilly and the couple now seeks convalidation
- questions exist about sacraments or freedom to marry in the Church
Please contact the parish office to speak with a priest.An annulment is the process by which the Church looks carefully at a previous marriage to see whether a true sacramental bond was established from the beginning.
Sometimes, because of circumstances present at the time of the wedding, a marriage may not have been valid in the full sense the Church understands marriage. The annulment process helps bring clarity to that question with care, honesty, and respect for everyone involved.
This process looks at the situation surrounding the marriage, including the preparation for marriage, each person’s understanding of the commitment being made, the freedom to enter marriage, and other important factors.
Every case is different. Some cases are more straightforward. Others take more time and require a more careful review. In every case, the Church seeks the truth with compassion and pastoral care.
If you would like to speak with someone about the annulment process, please contact the Parish Office at 845-651-7792 and ask to speak with a priest.
CONVALIDATION INFORMATION
Sometimes people speak about convalidation as “having your marriage blessed” in the Church. That expression is common, but the Church understands it in a deeper way. A convalidation is the moment when a couple gives their consent in the presence of the Church and begins a valid sacramental marriage.
This is usually needed when one or both spouses are baptized Catholics but were married outside the Catholic Church without the required permission or dispensation. For example, this may happen when a couple was married by a justice of the peace, in another Christian church, or in another religious tradition.
In the Catholic Church, a valid marriage requires proper preparation and the exchange of full and free consent according to the form required by the Church, in the presence of an authorized priest or deacon and two witnesses.
At the same time, the Church also recognizes that not every situation is the same. If neither spouse was Catholic at the time of the wedding, and they were married validly in their own Christian tradition, the Church may already recognize that marriage as valid. In such a case, convalidation may not be needed, even if one or both later enter into full communion with the Catholic Church.
Each couple’s story is different, and each situation deserves personal care and attention. If you have questions about your marriage situation, please contact the parish office. We will be glad to help guide you and explain the next steps.
If you would like to begin the convalidation process, please contact the parish so that a meeting can be arranged.
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Readings
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There are nine Old Testament options for the First Reading at a Nuptial Mass. On the following pages, you will find each reading in full, along with a short explanation to help you understand its meaning and main themes.
We encourage you to take some time with these readings, read them slowly, and pray over them together. As you prepare for marriage, ask the Lord to guide you toward the passage that best reflects your faith, your hopes, and the kind of Christian marriage to which He is calling you.
- Male and female he created them (Genesis 1:26-28, 31a)
- The two of them become one body (Genesis 2:18-24)
- In his love for Rebekah, Isaac found solace after the death of his mother (Genesis 24:48-51, 58-67)
- May the Lord of heaven prosper you both. May he grant you mercy and peace (Tobit 7:6-14)
- Allow us to live together to a happy old age (Tobit 8:4b-8)
- The woman who fears the Lord is to be praised (Proverbs 31:10-13, 19-20, 30-31)
- Stern as death is love (Song of Songs 2:8-10, 14, 16a; 8:6-7a)
- Like the sun rising in the Lord’s heavens, the beauty of a virtuous wife is the radiance of her home (Sirach 26:1-4, 13-16)
- I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah (Jeremiah 31:31-32a, 33-34a)
1. Male and female he created them.
A reading from the Book of Genesis 1:26-28, 31a
Then God said:
“Let us make man in our image, after our likeness.
Let them have dominion over the fish of the sea,
the birds of the air, and the cattle,
and over all the wild animals
and all the creatures that crawl on the ground.”
God created man in his image;
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them.
God blessed them, saying:
“Be fertile and multiply;
fill the earth and subdue it.
Have dominion over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air,
and all the living things that move on the earth.”
God looked at everything he had made, and he found it very good.
The word of the Lord.
2. The two of them become one body.
A reading from the Book of Genesis 2:18-24
The Lord God said: “It is not good for the man to be alone.
I will make a suitable partner for him.”
So the Lord God formed out of the ground
various wild animals and various birds of the air,
and he brought them to the man to see what he would call them;
whatever the man called each of them would be its name.
The man gave names to all the cattle,
all the birds of the air, and all wild animals;
but none proved to be the suitable partner for the man.
So the Lord God cast a deep sleep on the man,
and while he was asleep,
he took out one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh.
The Lord God then built up into a woman the rib
that he had taken from the man.
When he brought her to the man, the man said:
“This one, at last, is bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
This one shall be called ‘woman,’
for out of ‘her man’ this one has been taken.”
That is why a man leaves his father and mother
and clings to his wife,
and the two of them become one body.
The word of the Lord.
3. In his love for Rebekah, Isaac found solace after the death of his mother.
A reading from the Book of Genesis 24:48-51, 58-67
The servant of Abraham said to Laban:
“I bowed down in worship to the Lord,
blessing the Lord, the God of my master Abraham,
who had led me on the right road
to obtain the daughter of my master’s kinsman for his son.
If, therefore, you have in mind to show true loyalty to my master,
let me know;
but if not, let me know that, too.
I can then proceed accordingly.”
Laban and his household said in reply:
“This thing comes from the Lord;
we can say nothing to you either for or against it.
Here is Rebekah, ready for you;
take her with you,
that she may become the wife of your master’s son,
as the Lord has said.”
So they called Rebekah and asked her,
“Do you wish to go with this man?”
She answered, “I do.”
At this they allowed their sister Rebekah and her nurse to take leave,
along with Abraham’s servant and his men.
Invoking a blessing on Rebekah, they said:
“Sister, may you grow
into thousands of myriads;
And may your descendants gain possession
of the gates of their enemies!”
Then Rebekah and her maids started out;
they mounted their camels and followed the man.
so the servant took Rebekah and went on his way.
Meanwhile Isaac had gone from Beer-lahai-roi
and was living in the region of the Negeb.
One day toward evening he went out . . . in the field,
and as he looked around, he noticed that camels were approaching.
Rebekah, too, was looking about, and when she saw him,
she alighted from her camel and asked the servant,
“Who is the man out there, walking through the fields toward us?”
“That is my master,” replied the servant.
Then she covered herself with her veil.
The servant recounted to Isaac all the things he had done.
Then Isaac took Rebekah into his tent;
he married her, and thus she became his wife.
In his love for her Isaac found solace
after the death of his mother Sarah.
The word of the Lord.
4. May the Lord of heaven prosper you both. May he grant you mercy and peace.
A reading from the Book of Tobit 7:6-14
Raphael and Tobiah entered the house of Raguel and greeted him.
Raguel sprang up and kissed Tobiah, shedding tears of joy.
But when he heard that Tobit had lost his eyesight,
he was grieved and wept aloud.
He said to Tobiah:
“My child, God bless you!
You are the son of a noble and good father.
But what a terrible misfortune
that such a righteous and charitable man
should be afflicted with blindness!”
He continued to weep in the arms of his kinsman Tobiah.
His wife Edna also wept for Tobit;
and even their daughter Sarah began to weep.
Afterward, Raguel slaughtered a ram from the flock
and gave them a cordial reception.
When they had bathed and reclined to eat,
Tobiah said to Raphael, “Brother Azariah,
ask Raguel to let me marry my kinswoman Sarah.”
Raguel overheard the words;
so he said to the boy:
“Eat and drink and be merry tonight,
for no man is more entitled to marry my daughter Sarah
than you, brother.
Besides, not even I have the right to give her to anyone but you,
because you are my closest relative.
But I will explain the situation to you very frankly.
I have given her in marriage to seven men,
all of whom were kinsmen of ours,
and all died on the very night they approached her.
But now, son, eat and drink.
I am sure the Lord will look after you both.”
Tobiah answered, “I will eat or drink nothing
until you set aside what belongs to me.”
Raguel said to him: “I will do it.
She is yours according to the decree of the Book of Moses.
Your marriage to her has been decided in heaven!
Take your kinswoman
from now on you are her love,
and she is your beloved.
She is yours today and ever after.
And tonight, son, may the Lord of heaven prosper you both.
May he grant you mercy and peace.”
Then Raguel called his daughter Sarah, and she came to him.
He took her by the hand and gave her to Tobiah with the words:
“Take her according to the law.
According to the decree written in the Book of Moses she is your wife.
Take her and bring her back safely to your father.
And may the God of heaven grant both of you peace and prosperity.”
He then called her mother and told her to bring a scroll,
So that he might draw up a marriage contract
stating that he gave Sarah to Tobiah as his wife
according to the decree of the Mosaic law.
Her mother brought the scroll,
and he drew up the contract,
to which they affixed their seal.
Afterward they began to eat and drink.
The word of the Lord.
5. Allow us to live together to a happy old age.
A reading from the Book of Tobit 8:4b-8
On their wedding night Tobiah arose from bed and said to his wife,
“Sister, get up. Let us pray and beg our Lord
to have mercy on us and to grant us deliverance.”
Sarah got up, and they started to pray
and beg that deliverance might be theirs.
They began with these words:
“Blessed are you, O God of our fathers;
praised be your name forever and ever.
Let the heavens and all your creation
praise you forever.
You made Adam and you gave him his wife Eve
to be his help and support;
and from these two the human race descended.
You said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone;
let us make him a partner like himself.’
Now, Lord, you know that I take this wife of mine
not because of lust,
but for a noble purpose.
Call down your mercy on me and on her,
and allow us to live together to a happy old age.”
They said together, “Amen, amen.”
The word of the Lord.
6. The woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
A reading from the Book of Proverbs 31:10-13, 19-20, 30-31
When one finds a worthy wife,
her value is far beyond pearls.
Her husband, entrusting his heart to her,
has an unfailing prize.
She brings him good, and not evil,
all the days of her life.
She obtains wool and flax
and makes cloth with skillful hands.
She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her fingers ply the spindle.
She reaches out her hands to the poor,
and extends her arms to the needy.
Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting;
the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
Give her a reward of her labors,
and let her works praise her at the city gates.
The word of the Lord.
7. Stern as death is love.
A reading from the Song of Songs 2:8-10, 14, 16a; 8:6-7a
Hark! my lover–here he comes
springing across the mountains,
leaping across the hills.
My lover is like a gazelle
or a young stag.
Here he stands behind our wall,
gazing through the windows,
peering through the lattices.
My lover speaks; he says to me,
“Arise, my beloved, my dove, my beautiful one, and come!
“O my dove in the clefts of the rock,
in the secret recesses of the cliff,
Let me see you,
let me hear your voice,
for your voice is sweet,
and you are lovely.”
My lover belongs to me and I to him.
He says to me:
“Set me as a seal on your heart,
as a seal on your arm;
For stern as death is love,
relentless as the nether world is devotion;
its flames are a blazing fire.
Deep waters cannot quench love,
nor floods sweep it away.”
The word of the Lord.
8. Like the sun rising in the Lord’s heavens, the beauty of a virtuous wife is the radiance of her home.
A reading from the Book of Sirach 26:1-4, 13-16
Blessed the husband of a good wife,
twice-lengthened are his days;
A worthy wife brings joy to her husband,
peaceful and full is his life.
A good wife is a generous gift
bestowed upon him who fears the Lord;
Be he rich or poor, his heart is content,
and a smile is ever on his face.
A gracious wife delights her husband,
her thoughtfulness puts flesh on his bones;
A gift from the Lord is her governed speech,
and her firm virtue is of surpassing worth.
Choicest of blessings is a modest wife,
priceless her chaste soul.
A holy and decent woman adds grace upon grace;
indeed, no price is worthy of her temperate soul.
Like the sun rising in the Lord’s heavens,
the beauty of a virtuous wife is the radiance of her home.
The word of the Lord.
9. I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and the house of Judah.
A reading from the Book of the Prophet Jeremiah 31:31-32a, 33-34a
The days are coming, says the Lord,
when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel
and the house of Judah.
It will not be like the covenant I made with their fathers:
the day I took them by the hand
to lead them forth from the land of Egypt.
But this is the covenant which I will make
with the house of Israel after those days, says the Lord.
I will place my law within them, and write it upon their hearts;
I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
No longer will they have need to teach their friends and relatives
how to know the Lord.
All, from least to greatest, shall know me, says the Lord.
The word of the Lord.
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There are seven options for the Responsorial Psalm at a Nuptial Mass. We encourage you to take some time with these psalms, read them prayerfully together, and choose the one that best reflects your faith, your hopes, and the life you are asking God to bless in your marriage.
- The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord (Psalm 33)
- I will bless the Lord at all times (Psalm 34)
- The Lord is kind and merciful (Psalm 103)
- Blessed the man who greatly delights in the Lord’s commands (Psalm 112)
- Blessed are those who fear the Lord (Psalm 128)
- How good is the Lord to all (Psalm 145)
- Let all praise the name of the Lord (Psalm 148)
1. Psalm 33:12 and 18, 20-21, 22
R. (5b) The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
Blessed the nation whose God is the Lord,
the people he has chosen as his heritage.
Yes, the Lord’s eyes are upon those who fear him,
who hope in his merciful love.
R. The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
Our soul is waiting for the Lord,
He is our help and our shield,
in him do our hearts find joy.
We trust in his holy name.
R. The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
May your merciful love be upon us,
as we hope in you, O Lord.
R. The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord.
2. Psalm 34:2-3, 4-5, 6-7, 8-9
R. (2a) I will bless the Lord at all times.
OR:
R. (9a) Taste and see the goodness of the Lord.
I will bless the Lord at all times;
praise of him is always in my mouth.
In the Lord my soul shall make its boast;
the humble shall hear and be glad.
R. I will bless the Lord at all times.
OR:
R. Taste and see the goodness of the Lord.
Glorify the Lord with me,
together let us praise his name.
I sought the Lord, and he answered me
from all my terrors he set me free.
R. I will bless the Lord at all times.
OR:
R. Taste and see the goodness of the Lord.
Look toward him and be radiant;
let your faces not be abashed.
This lowly one called; the Lord heard,
and rescued him from all his distress.
R. I will bless the Lord at all times.
OR:
R. Taste and see the goodness of the Lord.
The angel of the Lord is encamped
around those who fear him, to rescue them.
Taste and see that the Lord is good.
Blessed the man who seeks refuge in him.
R. I will bless the Lord at all times.
OR:
R. Taste and see the goodness of the Lord.
3. Psalm 103:1-2, 8 and 13, 17-18a
R. (8a) The Lord is kind and merciful.
OR:
R. (see 17) The Lord’s kindness is everlasting to those who fear him.
Bless the Lord, O my soul;
and all within me, his holy name.
Bless the Lord, O my soul,
and never forget all his benefits.
R. The Lord is kind and merciful.
OR:
R. The Lord’s kindness is everlasting to those who fear him.
The Lord is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger and rich in mercy.
As a father has compassion on his children,
so the Lord’s compassion is on those who fear him.
R. The Lord is kind and merciful.
OR:
R. The Lord’s kindness is everlasting to those who fear him.
But the mercy of the Lord is everlasting
upon those who hold him in fear,
upon children’s children his righteousness,
for those who keep his covenant.
R. The Lord is kind and merciful.
OR:
R. The Lord’s kindness is everlasting to those who fear him.
4. Psalm 112:1bc-2, 3-4, 5-7a, 7b-8, 9
R. (see 1) Blessed the man who greatly delights in the Lord’s commands.
Blessed the man who fears the Lord,
who takes great delight in his commandments.
His descendants shall be powerful on earth;
the generation of the upright will be blest.
R. Blessed the man who greatly delights in the Lord’s commands.
Riches and wealth are in his house;
his righteousness stands firm forever.
A light rises in the darkness for the upright;
he is generous, merciful, and righteous.
R. Blessed the man who greatly delights in the Lord’s commands.
It goes well for the man who deals generously and lends,
who conducts his affairs with justice.
He will never be moved;
forever shall the righteous be remembered.
He has no fear of evil news.
R. Blessed the man who greatly delights in the Lord’s commands.
With a firm heart, he trusts in the Lord.
With a steadfast heart he will not fear;
he will see the downfall of his foes.
R. Blessed the man who greatly delights in the Lord’s commands.
Openhanded, he gives to the poor;
his righteousness stands firm forever.
His might shall be exalted in glory.
R. Blessed the man who greatly delights in the Lord’s commands.
5. Psalm 128:1-2, 3, 4-5
R. (see 1a) Blessed are those who fear the Lord.
OR:
R. (4) See how the Lord blesses those who fear him.
Blessed are all who fear the Lord,
and walk in his ways!
By the labor of your hands you shall eat.
You will be blessed and prosper.
R. Blessed are those who fear the Lord.
OR:
R. See how the Lord blesses those who fear him.
Your wife like a fruitful vine
in the heart of your house;
Your children like shoots of the olive.
around your table.
R. Blessed are those who fear the Lord.
OR:
R. See how the Lord blesses those who fear him.
Indeed thus shall be blessed
the man who fears the Lord.
May the Lord bless you from Zion:
all the days of your life!
May you see your children’s children.
R. Blessed are those who fear the Lord.
OR:
R. See how the Lord blesses those who fear him.
6. Psalm 145:8-9, 10 and 15, 17-18
R. (9a) How good is the Lord to all.
The Lord is kind and full of compassion,
slow to anger, abounding in mercy.
How good is the Lord to all,
compassionate to all his creatures.
R. How good is the Lord to all.
All your works shall thank you, O Lord,
and all your faithful ones bless you.
The eyes of all look to you
and you give them their food in due season.
R. How good is the Lord to all.
The Lord is righteous in all his ways
and holy in all his deeds.
The Lord is close to all who call him,
who call on him in truth.
R. How good is the Lord to all.
7. Psalm 148:1-2, 3-4, 9-10, 11-13a, 13c-14a
R. (13a) Let all praise the name of the Lord.
Praise the Lord from the heavens,
praise him in the heights;
Praise him, all you his angels,
praise him, all you his hosts.
R. Let all praise the name of the Lord.
Praise him, sun and moon;
praise him, all you shining stars.
Praise him, you highest heavens,
and you waters above the heavens.
R. Let all praise the name of the Lord.
Mountains and all hills,
fruit trees and all cedars;
beasts, both wild and tame,
creeping things and birds on the wing.
R. Let all praise the name of the Lord.
Kings of the earth and all peoples,
princes and all judges of the earth,
young men and maidens as well,
the old and the young together.
Let them praise the name of the Lord,
for his name alone is exalted.
R. Let all praise the name of the Lord.
His splendor above earth and heaven.
He exalts the strength of his people.
R. Let all praise the name of the Lord.
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There are fourteen options from the New Testament for the Second Reading at a Nuptial Mass. On this page, you will find each reading in full, together with a short explanation to help you understand its meaning and the main themes found in each passage.
We encourage you to take time with these readings, read them prayerfully together, and ask the Lord to guide you to the one that best reflects your faith, your hopes, and the kind of Christian marriage to which He is calling you.
- What will separate us from the love of Christ? (Romans 8:31b-35, 37-39)
- Offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God (Romans 12:1-2, 9-18)
- Welcome one another as Christ welcomed you (Romans 15:1b-3a, 5-7, 13)
- Your body is a temple of the Spirit (Corinthians 6:13c-15a, 17-20)
- If I do not have love, I gain nothing (Corinthians 12:31-13:8a)
- One Body and one Spirit (Ephesians 4:1-6)
- This is a great mystery, but I speak in reference to Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:2a, 21-33)
- The God of peace will be with you (Philippians 4:4-9)
- And over all these put on love, that is, the bond of perfection (Colossians 3:12-17)
- Let marriage be held in honor by all (Hebrews 13:1-4a, 5-6b)
- Be of one mind, sympathetic, loving toward one another (1 Peter 3:1-9)
- Love in deed and in truth (1 John 3:18-24)
- God is love (1 John 4:7-12)
- Blessed are those who have been called to the wedding feast of the Lamb (Revelation 19:1, 5-9a)
1. What will separate us from the love of Christ?
A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Romans 8:31b-35, 37-39
Brothers and sisters:
If God is for us, who can be against us?
He did not spare his own Son
but handed him over for us all,
how will he not also give us everything else along with him?
Who will bring a charge against God’s chosen ones?
It is God who acquits us.
Who will condemn?
It is Christ Jesus who died, rather, was raised,
who also is at the right hand of God,
who indeed intercedes for us.
What will separate us from the love of Christ?
Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine,
or nakedness, or peril, or the sword?
No, in all these things, we conquer overwhelmingly
through him who loved us.
For I am convinced that neither death, nor life,
nor angels, nor principalities,
nor present things, nor future things,
nor powers, nor height, nor depth,
nor any other creature will be able to separate us
from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
The word of the Lord.
2. Offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God.
Long Form: A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Romans 12:1-2, 9-18
I urge you, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God,
to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice,
holy and pleasing to God, your spiritual worship.
Do not conform yourselves to this age
but be transformed by the renewal of your mind,
that you may discern what is the will of God,
what is good and pleasing and perfect.
Let love be sincere;
hate what is evil,
hold on to what is good;
love one another with mutual affection;
anticipate one another in showing honor.
Do not grow slack in zeal,
be fervent in spirit,
serve the Lord.
Rejoice in hope,
endure in affliction,
persevere in prayer.
Contribute to the needs of the holy ones,
exercise hospitality.
Bless those who persecute you,
bless and do not curse them.
Rejoice with those who rejoice,
weep with those who weep.
Have the same regard for one another;
do not be haughty but associate with the lowly;
do not be wise in your own estimation.
Do not repay anyone evil for evil;
be concerned for what is noble in the sight of all.
If possible, on your part, live at peace with all
The word of the Lord.
OR
Short Form: A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Romans 12:1-2, 9-13
I urge you, brothers and sisters, by the mercies of God,
to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice,
holy and pleasing to God, your spiritual worship.
Do not conform yourselves to this age
but be transformed by the renewal of your mind,
that you may discern what is the will of God,
what is good and pleasing and perfect.
Let love be sincere;
hate what is evil,
hold on to what is good;
love one another with mutual affection;
anticipate one another in showing honor.
Do not grow slack in zeal,
be fervent in spirit,
serve the Lord.
Rejoice in hope,
endure in affliction,
persevere in prayer.
Contribute to the needs of the holy ones,
exercise hospitality.
The word of the Lord.
3. Welcome one another as Christ welcomed you.
A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Romans 15:1b-3a, 5-7, 13
Brothers and sisters:
We ought to put up with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves;
let each of us please our neighbor for the good,
for building up.
For Christ did not please himself.
May the God of endurance and encouragement
grant you to think in harmony with one another,
in keeping with Christ Jesus,
that with one accord you may with one voice
glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Welcome one another, then, as Christ welcomed you,
for the glory of God.
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing,
so that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
The word of the Lord.
4. Your body is a temple of the Spirit.
A reading from the First Letter of Saint Paul to the Corinthians 6:13c-15a, 17-20
Brothers and sisters:
The body is not for immorality, but for the Lord,
And the Lord is for the body;
God raised the Lord and will also raise us by his power.
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ?
Whoever is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him.
Avoid immorality.
Every other sin a person commits is outside the body,
but the immoral person sins against his own body.
Do you not know that your body
is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you,
whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?
For you have been purchased at a price.
Therefore glorify God in your body.
The word of the Lord.
5. If I do not have love, I gain nothing.
A reading from the First Letter of Saint Paul to the Corinthians 12:31–13:8a
Brothers and sisters:
Strive eagerly for the greatest spiritual gifts.
But I shall show you a still more excellent way.
If I speak in human and angelic tongues
but do not have love,
I am a resounding gong or a clashing cymbal.
And if I have the gift of prophecy
and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge;
if I have all faith so as to move mountains,
but do not have love, I am nothing.
If I give away everything I own,
and if I hand my body over so that I may boast
but do not have love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind.
It is not jealous, is not pompous,
it is not inflated, it is not rude,
it does not seek its own interests,
it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing
but rejoices with the truth.
It bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails.
The word of the Lord.
6. One Body and one Spirit.
A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Ephesians 4:1-6
Brothers and sisters:
I, a prisoner for the Lord,
urge you to live in a manner worthy of the call you have received,
with all humility and gentleness, with patience,
bearing with one another through love,
striving to preserve the unity of the Spirit
through the bond of peace: one Body and one Spirit,
as you were also called to the one hope of your call;
one Lord, one faith, one baptism;
one God and Father of all,
who is over all and through all and in all.
The word of the Lord.
7. This is a great mystery, but I speak in reference to Christ and the Church.
Long Form: A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Ephesians 5:2a, 21-33
Brothers and sisters:
Live in love, as Christ loved us
and handed himself over for us.
Be subordinate to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord.
For the husband is head of his wife
just as Christ is head of the Church,
he himself the savior of the body.
As the Church is subordinate to Christ,
so wives should be subordinate to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives,
even as Christ loved the Church
and handed himself over for her to sanctify her,
cleansing her by the bath of water with the word,
that he might present to himself the Church in splendor,
without spot or wrinkle or any such thing,
that she might be holy and without blemish.
So also husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.
He who loves his wife loves himself.
For no one hates his own flesh
but rather nourishes and cherishes it,
even as Christ does the Church,
because we are members of his Body.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother
and be joined to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.
This is a great mystery,
but I speak in reference to Christ and the Church.
In any case, each one of you should love his wife as himself,
and the wife should respect her husband.
The word of the Lord.
OR
Short Form: A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Ephesians 5:2a, 25-32
Brothers and sisters:
Live in love, as Christ loved us
and handed himself over for us.
Husbands, love your wives,
even as Christ loved the Church
and handed himself over for her to sanctify her,
cleansing her by the bath of water with the word,
that he might present to himself the Church in splendor,
without spot or wrinkle or any such thing,
that she might be holy and without blemish.
So also husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.
He who loves his wife loves himself.
For no one hates his own flesh
but rather nourishes and cherishes it,
even as Christ does the Church,
because we are members of his Body.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother
and be joined to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.
This is a great mystery,
but I speak in reference to Christ and the Church.
The word of the Lord.
8. The God of peace will be with you.
A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Philippians 4:4-9
Brothers and sisters:
Rejoice in the Lord always.
I shall say it again: rejoice!
Your kindness should be known to all.
The Lord is near.
Have no anxiety at all, but in everything,
by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
make your requests known to God.
Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding
will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally, brothers and sisters,
whatever is true, whatever is honorable,
whatever is just, whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious,
if there is any excellence
and if there is anything worthy of praise,
think about these things.
Keep on doing what you have learned and received
and heard and seen in me.
Then the God of peace will be with you.
The word of the Lord.
9. And over all these put on love, that is, the bond of perfection.
A reading from the Letter of Saint Paul to the Colossians 3:12-17
Brothers and sisters:
Put on, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved,
heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience,
bearing with one another and forgiving one another,
if one has a grievance against another;
as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also do.
And over all these put on love,
that is, the bond of perfection.
And let the peace of Christ control your hearts,
the peace into which you were also called in one Body.
And be thankful.
Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly,
as in all wisdom you teach and admonish one another,
singing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs
with gratitude in your hearts to God.
And whatever you do, in word or in deed,
do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus,
giving thanks to God the Father through him.
The word of the Lord.
10. Let marriage be held in honor by all.
A reading from the Letter to the Hebrews 13:1-4a, 5-6b
Brothers and sisters:
Let mutual love continue.
Do not neglect hospitality,
for through it some have unknowingly entertained angels.
Be mindful of prisoners as if sharing their imprisonment,
and of the ill-treated as of yourselves,
for you also are in the body.
Let marriage be honored among all
and the marriage bed be kept undefiled.
Let your life be free from love of money
but be content with what you have,
for he has said, I will never forsake you or abandon you.
Thus we may say with confidence:
The Lord is my helper,
and I will not be afraid.
The word of the Lord.
11. Be of one mind, sympathetic, loving toward one another.
A reading from the First Letter of Saint Peter 3:1-9
Beloved:
You wives should be subordinate to your husbands so that,
even if some disobey the word,
they may be won over without a word by their wives’ conduct
when they observe your reverent and chaste behavior.
Your adornment should not be an external one:
braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or dressing in fine clothes,
but rather the hidden character of the heart,
expressed in the imperishable beauty
of a gentle and calm disposition,
which is precious in the sight of God.
For this is also how the holy women who hoped in God
once used to adorn themselves
and were subordinate to their husbands;
thus Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him “lord.”
You are her children when you do what is good
and fear no intimidation.
Likewise, you husbands should live with your wives in understanding,
showing honor to the weaker female sex,
since we are joint heirs of the gift of life,
so that your prayers may not be hindered.
Finally, all of you, be of one mind, sympathetic,
loving toward one another, compassionate, humble.
Do not return evil for evil, or insult for insult;
but, on the contrary, a blessing, because to this you were called,
that you might inherit a blessing.
The word of the Lord.
12. Love in deed and in truth
A reading from the First Letter of Saint John 3:18-24
Children, let us love not in word or speech
but in deed and truth.
Now this is how we shall know that we belong to the truth
and reassure our hearts before him
in whatever our hearts condemn,
for God is greater than our hearts and knows everything.
Beloved, if our hearts do not condemn us,
we have confidence in God
and receive from him whatever we ask,
because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him.
And his commandment is this:
we should believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ,
and love one another just as he commanded us.
Those who keep his commandments remain in him, and he in them,
and the way we know that he remains in us
is from the Spirit that he gave us.
The word of the Lord.
13. God is love.
A reading from the First Letter of Saint John 4:7-12
Beloved, let us love one another,
because love is of God;
everyone who loves is begotten by God and knows God.
Whoever is without love does not know God, for God is love.
In this way the love of God was revealed to us:
God sent his only-begotten Son into the world
so that we might have life through him.
In this is love:
not that we have loved God, but that he loved us
and sent his Son as expiation for our sins.
Beloved, if God so loved us,
we also must love one another.
No one has ever seen God.
Yet, if we love one another, God remains in us,
and his love is brought to perfection in us.
The word of the Lord.
14. Blessed are those who have been called to the wedding feast of the Lamb.
A reading from the Book of Revelation 19:1, 5-9a
I, John, heard what sounded like the loud voice
of a great multitude in heaven, saying:
“Alleluia!
Salvation, glory, and might belong to our God.”
A voice coming from the throne said:
“Praise our God, all you his servants,
and you who revere him, small and great.”
Then I heard something like the sound of a great multitude
or the sound of rushing water or mighty peals of thunder,
as they said:
“Alleluia!
The Lord has established his reign,
our God, the almighty.
Let us rejoice and be glad
and give him glory.
For the wedding day of the Lamb has come,
his bride has made herself ready.
She was allowed to wear
a bright, clean linen garment.”
(The linen represents the righteous deeds of the holy ones.)
Then the angel said to me,
“Write this:
Blessed are those who have been called
to the wedding feast of the Lamb.”
The word of the Lord.
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There are ten options from the Gospels for the Gospel Reading at a Nuptial Mass. On this page, you will find each reading in full, together with a short explanation to help you understand its meaning and the main themes of each passage.
We encourage you to take time with these readings, read them prayerfully together, and ask the Lord to guide you to the one that best reflects your faith, your hopes, and the kind of Christian marriage to which He is calling you.
- Rejoice and be glad, for your reward will be great in heaven (Matthew 5:1-12a)
- You are the light of the world (Matthew 5:13-16)
- A wise man built his house on rock (Matthew 7:21, 24-29)
- What God has united, man must not separate (Matthew 19:3-6)
- This is the greatest and the first commandment. The second is like it. (Matthew 22:35-40)
- They are no longer two, but one flesh (Mark 10:6-9)
- Jesus did this as the beginning of his signs in Cana in Galilee (John 2:1-11)
- Remain in my love (John 15:9-12)
- This is my commandment: love one another (John 15:12-16)
- That they may be brought to perfection as one (John 17:20-26)
1. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward will be great in heaven.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to Matthew 5:1-12a
When Jesus saw the crowds, he went up the mountain,
and after he had sat down, his disciples came to him.
He began to teach them, saying:
“Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are they who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the land.
Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be satisfied.
Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
Blessed are the clean of heart,
for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called children of God.
Blessed are they who are persecuted for the sake of righteousness,
for theirs is the Kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when they insult you and persecute you
and utter every kind of evil against you falsely because of me.
Rejoice and be glad,
for your reward will be great in heaven.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
2. You are the light of the world.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to Matthew 5:13-16
Jesus said to his disciples:
“You are the salt of the earth.
But if salt loses its taste, with what can it be seasoned?
It is no longer good for anything
but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.
You are the light of the world.
A city set on a mountain cannot be hidden.
Nor do they light a lamp and then put it under a bushel basket;
it is set on a lampstand,
where it gives light to all in the house.
Just so, your light must shine before others,
that they may see your good deeds
and glorify your heavenly Father.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
3. A wise man built his house on rock.
Long Form: A reading from the holy Gospel according to Matthew 7:21, 24-29
Jesus said to his disciples:
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’
will enter the Kingdom of heaven,
but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven.
“Everyone who listens to these words of mine and acts on them
will be like a wise man who built his house on rock.
The rain fell, the floods came,
and the winds blew and buffeted the house.
But it did not collapse; it had been set solidly on rock.
And everyone who listens to these words of mine
but does not act on them
will be like a fool who built his house on sand.
The rain fell, the floods came,
and the winds blew and buffeted the house.
And it collapsed and was completely ruined.”
When Jesus finished these words,
the crowds were astonished at his teaching,
for he taught them as one having authority,
and not as their scribes.
The Gospel of the Lord.
OR
Short Form: A reading from the holy Gospel according to Matthew 7:21, 24-25
Jesus said to his disciples:
“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’
will enter the Kingdom of heaven,
but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven.
“Everyone who listens to these words of mine and acts on them
will be like a wise man who built his house on rock.
The rain fell, the floods came,
and the winds blew and buffeted the house.
But it did not collapse;
it had been set solidly on rock.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
4. What God has united, man must not separate.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to Matthew 19:3-6
Some Pharisees approached Jesus, and tested him, saying,
“Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever?”
He said in reply, “Have you not read that from the beginning
the Creator made them male and female and said,
For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother
and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh?
So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
Therefore, what God has joined together, man must not separate.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
5. This is the greatest and the first commandment. The second is like it.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to Matthew 22:35-40
One of the Pharisees, a scholar of the law, tested Jesus by asking,
“Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?”
He said to him,
“You shall love the Lord, your God,
with all your heart,
with all your soul,
and with all your mind.
This is the greatest and the first commandment.
The second is like it:
You shall love your neighbor as yourself.
The whole law and the prophets depend on these two commandments.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
6. They are no longer two, but one flesh.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to Mark 10:6-9
Jesus said:
“From the beginning of creation,
God made them male and female.
For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother
and be joined to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.
So they are no longer two but one flesh.
Therefore what God has joined together,
no human being must separate.
The Gospel of the Lord.
7. Jesus did this as the beginning of his signs in Cana in Galilee.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 2:1-11
There was a wedding in Cana in Galilee,
and the mother of Jesus was there.
Jesus and his disciples were also invited to the wedding.
When the wine ran short,
the mother of Jesus said to him,
“They have no wine.”
And Jesus said to her,
“Woman, how does your concern affect me?
My hour has not yet come.”
His mother said to the servers,
“Do whatever he tells you.”
Now there were six stone water jars there for Jewish ceremonial washings,
each holding twenty to thirty gallons.
Jesus told them,
“Fill the jars with water.”
So they filled them to the brim.
Then he told them,
“Draw some out now and take it to the headwaiter.”
So they took it.
And when the headwaiter tasted the water that had become wine,
without knowing where it came from
(although the servants who had drawn the water knew),
the headwaiter called the bridegroom and said to him,
“Everyone serves good wine first,
and then when people have drunk freely, an inferior one;
but you have kept the good wine until now.”
Jesus did this as the beginning of his signs in Cana in Galilee
and so revealed his glory,
and his disciples began to believe in him.
The Gospel of the Lord.
8. Remain in my love.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 15:9-12
Jesus said to his disciples:
“As the Father loves me, so I also love you.
Remain in my love.
If you keep my commandments, you will remain in my love,
just as I have kept my Father’s commandments
and remain in his love.
“I have told you this so that my joy might be in you
and your joy might be complete.
This is my commandment: love one another as I love you.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
9. This is my commandment: love one another.
A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 15:12-16
Jesus said to his disciples:
“This is my commandment: love one another as I love you.
No one has greater love than this,
to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
You are my friends if you do what I command you.
I no longer call you slaves,
because a slave does not know what his master is doing.
I have called you friends,
because I have told you everything I have heard from my Father.
It was not you who chose me, but I who chose you
and appointed you to go and bear fruit that will remain,
so that whatever you ask the Father in my name he may give you.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
10. That they may be brought to perfection as one.
Long Form: A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 17:20-26
Jesus raised his eyes to heaven and said:
“I pray not only for my disciples,
but also for those who will believe in me through their word,
so that they may all be one,
as you, Father, are in me and I in you,
that they also may be in us,
that the world may believe that you sent me.
And I have given them the glory you gave me,
so that they may be one, as we are one,
I in them and you in me,
that they may be brought to perfection as one,
that the world may know that you sent me,
and that you loved them even as you loved me.
Father, they are your gift to me.
I wish that where I am they also may be with me,
that they may see my glory that you gave me,
because you loved me before the foundation of the world.
Righteous Father, the world also does not know you,
but I know you, and they know that you sent me.
I made known to them your name and I will make it known,
that the love with which you loved me
may be in them and I in them.”
The Gospel of the Lord.
OR
Short Form: A reading from the holy Gospel according to John 17:20-23
Jesus raised his eyes to heaven and said:
“Holy Father, I pray not only for these,
but also for those who will believe in me through their word,
so that they may all be one,
as you, Father, are in me and I in you,
that they also may be in us,
that the world may believe that you sent me.
And I have given them the glory you gave me,
so that they may be one, as we are one,
I in them and you in me,
that they may be brought to perfection as one,
that the world may know that you sent me,
and that you loved them even as you loved me.”
The Gospel of the Lord
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